by @RamonaRichards

“The bad stuff is easier to believe.”

This is one of the most well-known movie quotations in the last forty years. Spoken by Julia Roberts as Vivian in Pretty Woman, it resonated with anyone who’s struggled with rejection and criticism, whether in their personal or professional lives. It was such a striking truth, that many people sat up straighter in their seats the minute it was spoken.

It was written by J. F. Lawton, and Pretty Woman was released when he was only 30. His original script, Three Thousand, had been an award winner even before the movie was made. It was one of the first he’d completed. 

But his journey was not an easy one, no matter his age when he saw his first success. Mr. Lawton is dyslexic and struggles with ADHD. It would have been much easier for him to tackle another profession, one that would not require him to battle these issues. Instead, he persevered (and remains an advocate for both), and in doing so, gave us one of the most memorable lines—and movies—of our generation. 

And that one line sums up so much in our world, in our lives. 

If you’re a writer, you’ve chosen a profession fraught with rejection and criticism. We’re often told to “grow a thick skin,” so that we can weather the obstacles that come our way without giving up. Because it would be easier to retreat, believe the bad stuff, and go another way. 

I know. Over the past few months, I’ve struggled with the decision to stop writing. The reasons are legion—including lots of rejections—and you’ve probably experienced one or all of them at one time in your writing journey. Add my age to any one of those reasons, and I’m met with the temptation to just work the day job as long as I can and focus off hours on reading, cross-stitching, and digging in the dirt. 

As with most writers, the day job pays the bills. But WRITING …?

Not so much. And I’m struggling with the direction my words need to take, and on my most discouraged days, I feel like I’m winking at a cute boy in the dark. How much easier would it be just to focus on the editing and let the writing fade away? 

Unbelievably easy. For a few days. 

The problem with this level of surrender is that I was a writer probably before I was born. I was published before I learned to edit. I’ve craved to write since I could hold a pencil, and my mother bought my first typewriter when I was 10. I finished my first short story soon after and my first novella at 13. I honestly do not know what a life without writing would look like. 

So what do I do to get past this? What would I encourage others to do to get past it?

• Accept that your words may never be published. This is a cruel fact of our industry. I have 5 novels—and more than 300 short stories—that will never be published. But unpublished works are not wheels spinning in mud—they are tiny courses in learning the craft. Even established authors need refreshers and reminders that this is not a smooth journey. And that’s OK.
• Write something every day. A journal entry. An exercise. A blog post. Even if it’s not in your desired genre. All of these go toward honing skills and reminding you that words are important, even if you’re the only one seeing them. 
• Talk to others about your struggles. I am. They are helping, even the folks who don’t know the industry. They listen and pray. Sometimes just expressing your frustrations can help you get past them. 
• Know that it’s OK to take a break as well. Yes … it’s best to write something every day. But giving yourself permission to take a breather while you’re working through your inner trials can help as well. In my case, taking a break makes me long to put words on paper to the point that I go a little nuts. I must write.
• Stay open to new ideas and new directions. I’m embracing one at the moment, a fleece (if you will) that I’ve placed before God with prayer. What happens next will be telling. 

Writing as a profession is a craft, an art, a business, and a calling. When all four come together, it’s remarkable and joyous. It doesn’t mean it’s always easy. 

It does mean it’s worth persevering. Whatever may come. 

Ramona Richards has been a published author since she was 17, and it’s been a bumpy ride with lots of rejections. She started doling those out to others in 1981. She’s the author of 13 books, including Tracking Changes: One Editor’s Advice to Inspirational Fiction Authors, which is out now, and Burying Daisy Doe, which will release next month—when she’ll start inundating her friends and family with social media posts. Her next conference appearance will be at Blue Ridge, where she hopes to sell books, teach writers, and enjoy the mountains.