By Tammy Karasek @tickledpinktam

They say a writer shouldn’t use ing or ly words. Then why did they give them to us in seventh grade language arts class and never tell you to stop until you attempted to write a book?

Time after time from conference classes, to workshops and into critique groups I’d be told ing and ly words are lazy and crutch words. I’d ask if I could have one or two lazy words every so often in the book. The answer was always a NO! Except from a few who told me to ignore all those that say no and just write my stories anyway.

I became so paranoid to use either of those word ends that it paralyzed the way I wrote. As in I wouldn’t finish the book or take critique pieces any longer. I’d type “I’ll bring you a cookie” and gasp. Oh no, bring ends with an ing. I’d change it to, “I’ll carry in a cookie to you.” Well, that’s not awkward, is it?

I’d write and rewrite my work and take every, stinkin’ ing or ly word out and reword the sentences. It began to overwhelm me to the point that I’d never finish my stories. I’d write and submit articles here and there. Pieces were also chosen for compilation books along the way. But my full books? Nope. The fear of having one ing or ly word in there kept me at the almost finished point for a few years. I kept silent about my angst of the ing/lydilemma.

Then I started to see other folks with those words in their completed manuscripts and gasp—in published books, too. At first, they were ever so sneaky with one or two in a few places. Then one book I read was loaded with them—so many within the first chapter no less. And surprise, the book seemed to sell quite well. Hmmm.

Recently someone wise told me, “Your perfectionism has stifled your creativity.”

[tweet_box design=”default” float=”none” inject=”#BRMCWC #Writing #Writinglife”]A Writer’s Frustration by @tickledpinktam on @BRMCWC[/tweet_box]

Wait, what? Is that why stories are sitting in my Scrivener files in the “almost done” mode? Is that why I break out into a sweat when I open up a file to start to work on it, aware of the fact that it’s close to the end, but tremble when I think I might have missed and ing or ly word in there somewhere?

Another friend told me a couple of weeks ago, “Whoever told you not to ever use ing or ly words is a bit exaggerated in that statement. No, don’t fill your book with them, but they’re a part of the English language, use them.”

So, I’ve decided to have peace with ing and ly. I will allow them to show up on occasion as needed. I will not be afraid of them, but will use them sparingly—OH NO, that word has an ing and ly both!

I hope you’ve had a good laugh at my expense with this post. I can laugh (sort of) now. While I may (or may not) be exaggerating my fear a little, my goal is to tell you, as you study the craft of writing books, learn the rules. Understand the why’s of certain things that are frowned upon (or at least understand as best you can). And when you start getting so many conflicting comments on a particular rule, don’t ask another writer friend their opinion, consult an editor who’s been in the field working for a good number of years and continues to learn and stay up with current rules. Not someone who has decided they will be an editor with little to no training in the industry.

My second suggestion is to invest in a Chicago Manual of Style book or digital subscription. Trust me, you’ll save several years of frustration from conflicting or misinformation with regard to your writing and the rules. Save yourself the hassle which can turn into the point of not writing much at all.

What about you? Have you received information that confused you to the point of stifling your creativity and writing?

Tammy Karasek uses humor and wit to bring joy and hope to every aspect in life. Her past, filled with bullying and criticism from family, drives her passion to encourage and inspire others and show them The Reason to smile. She’s gone from down and defeated to living a “Tickled Pink” life as she believes there’s always a giggle wanting to come out!

She’s a writer of Romantic Suspense—with a splash of sass. Her debut book, Launch That Book, released in November 2023. She’s published in a Divine Moments Compilation Book—Cool-inary Moments. Also, she’s a writing team member for The Write Conversation, The Write Editing, Blue Ridge Conference Blog, and more.

Known as The Launch Team Geek, she helps authors launch their books. You’ll also find her as a Virtual Assistant for several best-selling authors, the Social Media Manager for the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference, Founding President of ACFW Upstate SC, and Founding President of Word Weavers Upstate SC. Connect with Tammy at https://www.tammykarasek.com.